How you use an exclamation point can really affect your dating life.
Texting has taken away the voice signals we used to obsess over when trying to figure out if someone was interested. Now, we only have around 140 to 160 characters to study. With less information, our overthinking reaches a new level of craziness.
A big part of this is reading too much into every small detail in a text, especially punctuation. So, here’s what his or her punctuation choices are telling you—and what you’re saying with yours too.
- Period.
Meaning: You’re done with the conversation and don’t want to chat all night.
When texting, it’s common to skip ending a sentence with punctuation. You can just leave it hanging. So, when you use a period, it adds a sense of finality. Compare:
“I’m grabbing coffee right now.”
“I’m grabbing coffee right now”
The first one shows that the conversation is over. You have plans, and they don’t involve texting further—period. But in the second example, without the period, it feels more open. You’re going to the party, but maybe there’s room for more conversation later. Periods close things. Without them, things stay open-ended.
- Exclamation!
Meaning: It can signal anything from playful to desperate, depending on how it’s used.
The exclamation point is your most powerful punctuation mark, but it can also be risky. When used right, just one exclamation point can create a fun vibe, show excitement, or even suggest interest. Compare:
“Let me know what time you’re free to grab coffee.”
“Let me know what time you’re free to grab coffee!”
The second version feels much more eager to meet up, even though the words are exactly the same.
But watch out. Exclamation points are the most overused punctuation these days. Overdoing it can make you seem unpolished:
“Sounds good! Not sure if we’re going, but I might see you at the party! If you leave, let me know!”
The first exclamation point works … the second feels too eager … and the third comes off as desperate. When in doubt, leave it out. It’s always better to keep it cool than to sound like you’re 12, posting on YouTube.
- Semicolon;
Meaning: You’re putting in too much effort.
Semicolons aren’t used in everyday texting; they belong in formal writing, not casual chats. When you include one in a message, it shows you’ve overthought and polished what you’re saying.
This comes across as trying too hard, and that’s never a good look. Using a semicolon in a text is like dressing up for a workout—unnecessary and over the top.
- Apostrophe (‘)
Meaning: You care about details.
In texting, apostrophes are becoming rare. “Youd” is fine in place of “you’d.” “Id” works just like “I’d.” “Youre” is accepted instead of “you’re” (or sometimes even “your”).
So when you actually use an apostrophe, it stands out. It gives off the vibe that you take the time to get things right. This can subtly suggest that you’re someone who puts in effort, which could hint that you’d be thoughtful and committed in a relationship—or at least make for one unforgettable encounter.
- Braces {}
Meaning: You’re thinking about this too logically.
In everyday texting, people don’t use braces unless they’re into math or coding. If someone adds these symbols, it means they’re approaching the situation with too much logic and analysis. Here’s a heads-up: tech humor incoming.
if (texts == flirty) {
ask(“Want to hang out this weekend?”)
}
else if (texts != friendly) {
wait(“Maybe they’re not interested.”)
}
- Asterisk*
Meaning: You’re worried the other person isn’t as laid-back as you.
The primary reason people use asterisks in texts is to cover up a word, like this: “I enjoy intense workouts, so my buddies call me the F*** of Fitness. What they don’t know is that I’m secretly planning my revenge.”
Censoring a swear word usually means you’re worried that the other person might not be as laid-back as you are. If they were, they’d be freely using all kinds of profanity without holding back.
Asterisks suggest that you believe the other person isn’t as bold as you are. Keep asterisks for light-hearted moments, like this: “I’ll bet you $100* that I can beat you at karaoke.
*prize may be exchanged for a coffee or a duet.”
- Plus +
Meaning: You’re really into this person.
When you use a plus sign instead of saying “and” or using an ampersand, it shows that you have strong feelings for someone. Couples often use a plus sign when they carve their names into trees, like this: “Alex + Jamie. March 2020. Forever in love”; “Sam + Taylor. June 2022. Together always”; “Chris + Pat. November 2019. Adventure awaits.”
A plus sign isn’t just a replacement for “and”—it symbolizes a deeper connection. So, if you text, “You + me should hit the arcade,” you’re essentially marking those arcade plans—and the feelings behind them—into a tree.
- Emoticons
Meaning: You want to add some excitement to the chat.
Texting can feel flat and lacking emotion. Emoticons, even if they seem a bit childish, can really help make your messages more vibrant and engaging (not like the cheap 3-D effects in some movies that just hike up ticket prices).
For girls, it’s important to use them wisely. If you overdo it, you might come off as childish. I know a guy who texted a girl who used a winky face in every single message. It felt like he was talking to a middle schooler instead of an adult.
For guys, it’s even trickier. If you use more than one emoticon for every hundred texts, it could really hurt your image.
- Ellipses…
Meaning: You want them to think deeper about your message.
When you use ellipses in a text, it shows you’re hinting at something you either can’t say directly yet or are hesitant to bring up. It suggests you want the other person to read between the lines. For instance, consider this example:
“Sure, we could go see that action movie… I’ve also heard the new rom-com is pretty cute… How about we just meet at 8?”
In this case, the ellipses signal that there’s more to the story. You’re leaving it open for interpretation, which can make the conversation more intriguing.
The real meaning behind that text is pretty obvious: “There’s no way I want to watch a movie about kickboxing. Seriously, why would you suggest that? I’d much prefer a rom-com. And since this conversation is awkward, let’s just meet at the theater so I can leave if I need to.”
Ellipses can also create a playful vibe, sparking curiosity in the reader:
“Had a few too many drinks last night… legs are sore from dancing… just relaxing in the bathtub…”
This message takes three separate thoughts and adds a hint of flirtation with those ellipses. (Unless it’s from a guy, then it might just come off as strange.)
- Question Marks ?
Meaning: It all hinges on how many you use.
Question marks can pile up quickly. The more you add, the different the meaning becomes.
“What time should we meet?” This is straightforward and friendly. It asks for a reply while keeping things light.
“What time should we meet??” This looks like a mistake.
“What time should we meet???” This comes off as impatient and a bit childish. It sounds demanding, suggesting that you expect an answer you want to hear.
What time do you want to hang out????** This turns playful. It feels like a joke now. If you had to say this aloud, you might even sing it.
What time do you want to hang out????? This is excessive. It’s puzzling. Why do you need five question marks? It makes you sound like someone who would type “kool.”
So, stick to one question mark to keep the chat flowing. Use four for a flirty vibe. Anything more and you might be overdoing it.
- Tilde ~
Meaning: You might be a punctuation pro who enjoys breaking the rules … or you could be Hispanic.
Either way, you seem pretty interesting to me.
